Emma’s Diary Feature: Why I Hate The Term “Daddy Day Care”

Partnering with Emma’s Diary has helped me reach so many prospective parents, newborn mums and toddler handlers. Working with this platform is one of my proudest writing achievements and I love having the opportunity to tackle controversial subjects. Today I’m talking all about the role of the Dads and co-parents. It’s a controversial one, before this post actually went live, I received some feedback and it was *wild*

I want to start this post off with a simple statement:

I am woman, hear me roar!

Being a mum to Jack is one of the best things in my life. Genuinely, I’ve never felt happier or more like I’m in the right place, doing the right thing. Since childhood, I’ve always wanted to be a Mum and while some days are so tough, I wouldn’t have it any other way.

Being Jack’s mum is a huge part of my identity. It’s all-consuming, it’s everything and it has taken over a huge chunk of my old life. But, he’s only 17 months old. He needs me so much right now, I’m the centre of his universe. It’s ok to be where I am right now, my job is to be there for and with him.

The Roles of Mum & Dad

I’ll add a caveat before I go into full-on rant mode: my husband is INCREDIBLE.

He is Jack’s favourite person; he is an amazing dad and I love seeing him enjoying fatherhood. Way back when I definitely picked well!

But, as a mum, I find it insane how different the roles are for a mum and a dad. Not necessarily set by us as a family but by others and by society.

Here’s an example:

Every single day, Jack and I go out for a park trip or a food shop, or just to run errands. He’s my little sidekick and always with me. He’s there when I shower, when I’m doing laundry, when I’d prefer some privacy in the bathroom.

And, sadly, it’s not often that I’m stopped and praised by strangers telling me what a great job I’m doing.

However, when my husband takes Jack out to the supermarket, to the park, or anywhere on his own, he is *always* complimented on what a great, hands-on dad he is!

Daddy Day Care…

The double standards and comments in society can make me laugh out loud at times.

OK, so I don’t need compliments every time I’m out in the wild solo parenting.

But one thing that really grinds my gears is the term “Daddy Day Care” – and I know I’m not alone!

In my house, there’s no such thing as Daddy Day Care.

Daddy works very hard in the week and does his share of dinner prepping, playing, pushing on swings, bath time, and bedtimes. We are a team. At weekends, he’s chief mischief maker and wind-up merchant.

If I go out, he’s the one to take care of Jack and he’s the best person to do the job other than me.

We’re a team – morning, noon, and night. And in the middle of the night, if need be.

How Do We Break The Cycle?

READ THE FULL ARTICLE ON EMMA’S DIARY HERE

What do you think of the term Daddy day care?

What capacity does your husband or other half help?

How would you break this cycle?

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PEOPLE ALSO ASK…

What is a fathers role with a newborn?

Fathers can read or speak to their baby to enhance this bond and encourage language development. Fathers can also change diapers and offer bottle feeds, in addition to rocking, holding (including skin-to-skin/kangaroo care), soothing, and playing with their newborns.

Should dads help with baby?

Dads and partners can take an active role in touring the birth hospital, choosing a pediatrician, helping the pregnant partner make a birth plan and accompanying them to birthing and breastfeeding classes. The father or partner can also be a great birth coach.

Why is my husband not helping with newborn?

One reason for your husband’s resistance to caring for the baby—even for a mere 30 minutes—is that he hasn’t had much practice to do so. Rather than face the disappointment and frustration of, say, not being able to soothe him to sleep, he’d rather hand him over to you to take care of the issue.

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